You Still Have All of Me
by xMadeline11x
Summary: It takes an accident and a death for Rory Gilmore to realize who she really has feelings for. Complete.
1. The Accident

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**Author's Note: Okay, so this is a short story, just a few chapters. I've been wanting to write a Rory/Jess type of story for a while now. This takes place when Rory and Dean are still going out. So yeah. Btw this chapter might be a little boring, I needed it to set up what's gonna happen next. **

"What are you doing here?" Rory asked Jess who had showed up unannounced at her house. He smirked at her.

"Oh come on. We're friends aren't we? Come out with me." Rory knew that Dean wouldn't like it if she went anywhere with Jess. But she couldn't help it. He was so mysterious. So interesting. It took her a lot to give him her normal excuse.

"I have to study." She said, starting to try to shut the door.

"You study too much. Come on, let's have some fun. We'll....go get ice cream or something." Rory gave in. Ice cream seemed harmless after all.

"Okay fine, let me grab my coat." She went back in the house and grabbed her coat. She left a quick note to her mom. "We can take my car." She said as she shut the door.

"Can I drive?" Jess asked her. She was hesitant, she almost said no.

"Sure, why not." She said as she tossed him the keys. To her surprise he started driving towards Hartford. "Wait, I thought we were just going to get ice cream?"

"The night is young. You actually want ice cream? We can go get ice cream in Hartford." Jess was still smirking.

"Fine." Rory didn't like practically being held captive. Once they got to Hartford Jess pulled up at an ice cream/coffee shop. They went in and got some ice cream. They sat and talked for a long time. They talked about books, school, movies, and friends. By the time they got back in the car the subject had gotten around to Dean.

"You know Rory, I think you could do better than that guy." Jess said seriously.

"What's wrong with Dean?" Rory loved Dean. She didn't like that Jess always put him down.

"He's so clingy, he acts like you're his property. Not to mention he's so boring and predictable." Jess smirked again at her. Whenever Rory saw Jess smile or smirk it always infuriated her.

"He is not predictable. And he is not clingy. And....Oh my God! Jess!" Rory pointed at the road. "Jess!"

And then it all went black.


	2. Too Much to Handle

Lorelei Gilmore found it strange when she got home late from working at the Independence Inn that night, and saw that her daughter Rory wasn't there. She saw a note on the table from Rory, dated back to about 5 o'clock, saying that she was going out and that she should be back around seven. Lorelei tried to push it out of the back of her mind as she heated up some dinner.

At nine o'clock Luke Danes closed up his diner, as he did every night. After all the chairs were on the tables and the door was locked he went upstairs to see if his nephew Jess wanted something to eat. He wasn't too surprised to find the upstairs "apartment" empty. Jess was always out doing something mischevious. Then he got the phone call.

Around nine thirty Lorelei went upstairs to get ready for bed. She was trying her best not to be worried about Rory, she hoped that Rory was out having fun with her boyfriend Dean or something. Then she heard the phone ring. After she picked it up and heard what the person on the other line said, she dropped the phone on the ground. Not bothering to pick it up she drove to the hospital in Hartford in her pajamas.

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Early the next morning when Rory woke up, she was very confused. Her head was throbbing, hard, and her shoulder felt like someone had ripped it in half it hurt so bad. She ran her hand gently along her forehead. She noticed that right about her left eye she had a bandage, covering a deep gash that had needed stitches. Then she looked around her room. She was obviously in a hospital room. She saw her mom, leaning on her bed, sleeping. Dean was sleeping in a chair in the corner. She sat up, which woke her mother.

"Rory! Rory...." Lorelei held Rory and started crying hysterically. Rory didn't say anything. She tried as hard as she could to remember the night before. Before she could remember anything a doctor came into her room. As the doctor shut the door Dean woke up startlingly.

"Rory!" He said quietly but was cut off by the doctor.

"Hello Miss Gilmore. How are you feeling?" The doctor asked cheerfully. Rory didn't say anything. This upset Lorelei.

"Why isn't she talking? Is she alright?" She asked the doctor worriedly.

"Probably some post traumatic stress." The doctor said, still sounding upbeat. "You can hear me, right Rory?" Rory nodded her head very slightly. "Rory, you were in a bad car accident. A car hit you head on. You suffered a mild concussion, and you have a nasty gash above your left eye. You also did something that almost rarely happens, you've fractured your shoulder blade. You'll need to go into surgery later today to help fix it." Rory tried to comprehend all that the doctor had said. She really didn't care what had happened to her. She wanted to know what happened to Jess.

"Rory sweetie, did you hear the doctor?" Lorelei asked Rory nicely. Rory nodded again. She hated being talked to like a little kid.

"I'll be back later to prep you for surgery." The doctor said as he left the room. Rory sank back into her bed. Lorelei wouldn't take her eyes off Rory. She couldn't stand to see her only daughter laying in a hospital bed, all broken. Dean was staring at Rory with an intense look, as if he didn't know what to say to her.

"Is there anything I can get you Rory?" Lorelei asked her. She was still worried that Rory wasn't talking. Rory shook her head. "Does it hurt? Should I call a nurse to get you more pain meds?" Rory shook her head.

"Mom." She said quietly, her voice was hoarse and weak. Rory was surprised at how hard it was to talk.

"Yeah Rory?" Lorelei replied quickly, happy that Rory was talking. Rory paused a moment, she had to get enough strength to say a full sentence.

"What happened to Jess?" Rory's eyes filled with tears as she said it. She knew it had to be something bad. As soon as she asked Dean wouldn't make eye contact with her, and Lorelei had to wipe away some tears before answering.

"Oh Rory. He's in a coma. It's not looking good. They don't think he'll make it more than a few days." And with that news Rory broke down. It was much more than she could handle.


	3. Why Did This Happen to Us?

**Auhtor's Note: Okay, so I wrote this chapter and the next one during school, actually possibly different days. So if they seem a little short or unbalanced, I apologize. **

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Rory went into surgery later that afternoon. Lorelai decided to take the opportunity to take a break and go home for a couple hours. She had just gotten out of the shower and gotten dressed when the doorbell rang. She wrapped her hair in a towel and went to answer it. To her surprise, Luke was standing at her door, looking awful and scruffier than usual. "Luke." She said quietly, and almost sadly.

"Lorelai, I am so sorry about Rory. This is all my fault." He said, sounding truly remorseful. Lorelai quickly ushered him in and they sat together on the couch.

"Luke, you can't take the blame for this. It's gonna eat you alive on the inside if you do." Throughout this whole experience Lorelai had tried her best not to blame anyone for what happened.

"But...Jess.." Lorelai cut him off before Luke could explain his reasoning. Lorelai figured that if he came up with a good excuse that she'd actually believe it. It was really hard on her to see Luke like this. He was usually good at keeping himself together.

"Luke stop..." Lorelai said really quietly. "So, how is he?" Lorelai really didn't want to hear the grim news, but she felt obligated to ask none the less.

"There hasn't been a change. I called Lizzie, and she should be here any minute. I guess I should be there when she comes, so I'll be going now." Luke said awkwardly, trying not to let his emotions get the best of him.

"Yeah, me too actually. Rory should be getting out of surgery sometime soon." Lorelai stood up and took the towel out of her hair. "I guess I'll..uh..see you later." Just after Luke left Lorelai broke down, right in the doorway. She wasn't ready for something like this. It was too much. Just too much.

When Rory got out of surgery and back in her room her mom wasn't there yet. The only person in her room was Dean. "Hey," She said quietly.

"Hey." He said back, in his deep, hypnotizing voice. He looked as if he hadn't gotten any sleep in a long time.

"You should go home and get some sleep. I'm fine." Rory told him. The truth was that she really just wanted to be alone. She really just needed some time to wrap her head around what happened. She also had been felling some strange emotions.

"I'm not going to leave you Rory. I love you, and I'm not going to leave you all alone like this." Dean said adamantly. Rory's mind had just flashed to all the things that Jess had said in the car the other day. Especially the clingy thing.

"I'm just saying, I'd kinda like some time alone. A lot has happened and I need some time to think about it." Rory said, trying not to let out any attitude out in her tone, but failing miserably.

"Well okay then." Dean replied as he somewhat angrily left the room. Rory knew that he was going to act like a diva about it. Which also brought her back to what Jess had said, about Dean also being predictable. Just as Dean left the room Lorelai walked in.

"Should I ask?" Lorelai looked at Rory. Rory shook her head. She looked at Lorelai.

"Mom," Rory said very quietly yet seriously. "How's Jess?"

"Sweetie, nothing has changed. The outlook still isn't too good." Lorelai said sadly. Lorelai got tears in her eyes as she saw the look on Rory's face.

"I want to see him. I need to see him." Rory said quietly yet determined.

"What?" Lorelai was slightly surprised at what Rory said.

"Jess, I want to see Jess!" Rory said loudly. So Lorelai called in a nurse and despite Rory's pleas that she didn't need one, got pushed to Jess's room in a wheelchair, hanging onto her monitor thingie that was on wheels, to make sure that she didn't drop dead or anything. Lorelai gave Rory some privacy.

Rory took Jess' hand and held it in hers. She tired to hold back her tears, but a single tear trickled down her face. "Oh Jess." Rory's voice cracked as she spoke to him. "Why did this happen? Why did this happen to us?"


	4. He Speaks

**Author's Note: Again, so this chapter was written during school, except the first part(the Luke and Lorelai diologue). So if it's unbalanced or too short, or something, I apologize. **

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As Rory sat by Jess' bedside Lorelai stood outside watching. Luke came up out of nowhere and scared the crap out of her. She screamed slightly. "Where did you come from?" She said quickly.

"Over there. What's Rory doing?" He said looking at Rory. He was slightly confused.

"Luke I think that there's something going on between Jess and Rory." Lorelai said, looking in the window to Jess' room.

"What are you talking about? He's not even conscious." Luke said, being really confused about what Lorelai was talking about.

"The car ride, my daughter sitting next to his side, you can't deny that something isn't or wasn't going on between them." Lorelai wasn't making much sense to Luke, but she was making sense in her head.

"Whatever." Luke said, kinda blowing her off. "I'm going to go see if Liz is here yet." He said as he walked down the hallway, away from Lorelai and her crazy theories.

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As Rory was sitting with Jess she vaguely remembered reading something about that people in a coma can here when you talk to them. So she talked to him. She told him about the books she had been reading. She told him about school at Chilton. She even told him some of her secrets. What she didn't realize was that she had been talking to him for over two hours, and that her mom, Luke, and Jess' mom Liz were watching her from the window. Once she noticed them she blushed, stood up, and wheeled the unnecessary wheelchair out of the room. On the way back to her room she noticed Dean had been one of the people watching her and Jess. He beat her back to her room.

"What the Hell was that Rory?" He asked her angrily.

"What are you talking about?" Rory was confused.

"Why were you in there? Why were you talking to that asshole? It's his fault that you're here in the first place. It's his fault that you have a concussion, and you needed stitches, and that your shoulder is busted." Dean was full on shouting now. People walking down the hallway were starting to stare at them.

"It was not his fault!" Now Rory was shouting too. "It was that jerk who ran the red light. It doesn't take a genius to figure that out!"

"If he hadn't tricked you into going with him..." Rory cut Dean off before he could finish.

"He didn't trick me into going. I wanted to go with him." Rory was on the verge of tears now.

"Why would you want to go with him? What appealed you to that idea? What in your brain, registered that it would be an okay thing to do?" Dean just couldn't seem to get a grip on why Rory would even want to associate with Jess.

"Because he's better friend than you could ever be! He listens to me. He understands me. He actually cares about me. You know what Dean? Just leave. Why don't you just get out of here? It's over!" Rory screamed at Dean, tears streaming down her face uncontrollably. Dean did exactly what Rory told him to do. Rory went back into her hospital room. Lorelai walked in, looking unsure of what to say. "I bet you heard all that." Lorelai nodded. Rory didn't talk to anyone else the rest of the night.

Around midnight Rory could not sleep at all. She got up and walked quietly down the hallway. She observed how creepy the hospital was at night. She slid ever so quietly into Jess' room. She pulled up a chair next to his bed. She held his hand in hers. She stroked his hair. Then she burst into tears. She couldn't stop, she just kept crying. All of a sudden, to her utter surprise, he spoke.

"Rory." He said softly and weakly as he opened his eyes. "Don't cry."


	5. Movin' On

"_Rory," He said softly and weakly as he opened his eyes. "Don't cry." _

Rory sat up in shock. She wiped her eyes and stared at him, wide eyed. "Jess." She said quietly.

"Rory," He replied still softly. "What happened?" He asked her.

"What do you mean?" Rory was confused. She was still a little shocked by the fact that Jess was awake and talking.

"You're crying." Jess pointed out obviously.

"It was Dean...well it was nothing." Rory said quickly, not looking him in the eye.

"Right. Rory I have to tell you something." Jess said seriously.

"Okay. Does it have to be now? I was going to go get some coffee..." Rory said pointing towards the door. She all of a sudden got worried when she saw Jess' face.

"Rory, this is important. I have to tell you something now. I...I don't think that I'll be able to hold on much longer." Jess didn't seem too shaken by the fact that he was discussing his near coming death.

"What are you talking about? But..but you're awake....you're..." Jess cut her off.

"Rory it was hard enough for me to stay around long enough to tell you this. Rory..." Jess' voice almost started to fade off. It took him a second to come back and finish his sentence. Rory got tears in her eyes as she watched him struggle. "Rory, I love you." He shut his eyes.

"I love you too." She whispered softly. Tears were now pouring down his face, she knew what was going to happen next. She took his hand and stroked it. After about a minute Jess took one last breath, and the monitor hooked up to his finger beeped loudly. Rory started crying even harder. A doctor and two nurses came running into the room. They looked at the monitor and the doctor turned it off.

"Time of death: 12:42AM." He said softly as he left the room, probably trying to find Liz. Rory couldn't leave his side, she couldn't register that he was gone, like forever. After a few minutes Liz and Luke barged into the room. Rory was still sitting there, she was even still holding his hand. Lorelai came in like a minute later and took Rory out. They went back into Rory's room. Rory sat and cried in Lorelai's shoulder. After a while Rory fell asleep. Lorelai was worried about her daughter.

Rory went home the next day. She went right to her room and wouldn't come out. She just sat there, looking through books and listening to some of Lane's weird CDs. Then Rory did the craziest thing. She took book after book off her bookshelf and put them in boxes. By mid afternoon she had about three big boxes full of books. She only had one slightly full shelf of books left. She put her hair up and washed her face then found her mom in the living room.

"Hey mom can you help me with something?" Rory asked innocently.

"Sure babe, what's up?" Lorelai asked, happy that Rory wanted to get up and do something.

"Will you drive me to Hartford today? I have some books that I'd like to sell at the used bookstore." Rory said, leading her mom into her room.

"Rory are you feeling alright? You're selling all these books?" Lorelai was shocked. Never in a million years would Rory be able part with one book. It took her until she was ten to part with some of her picture books.

"Yeah mom, I need to clean out my room and my life. I need to move on."

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**Okay, so first off I didn't want to kill him, but I had the whole story planned out from the beginning. So sorry.**

**Please keep reading and reviewing!**


	6. More Than You Know

**Okay, so like people have been saying that they're shocked and angry about what happened to Jess. Just so you know this was my plan from the beginning, and that's the death I was talking about in the summary. I have to admit, I was in a morbid mood when I came up with the idea for this story. Just wanted to let y'all know. **

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The next day was Monday, and Lorelai felt guilty about going back to work at the inn. She didn't want to leave Rory alone. "Rory! Are you sure you don't need me to stay home with you today? I don't have to go to work yet." She shouted as she came down the stairs. Rory came out of her room in her pajamas.

"Mom I am fine. I'm just going to stay in bed and read or I'll go to the video rental store and rent a movie or something. I'll be fine." Rory assured her mom. She didn't even have to lie, she was fine. She wasn't letting all that happened get to her.

"Well okay, call me if you need anything, anything. I can come right home if you need me." Lorelai said, trying to get an excuse to stay at home.

"I'll be fine, but I know who to call if I all of sudden become not fine." Rory said and kissed her mother on the cheek.

"Okay, well, I guess I'm leaving now." Lorelai said. "Off to work, where I have to deal with annoying people all day, when I could be at home..."

"Bye Mom!" Rory said cutting her off. Rory slid down on the floor next to the front door as soon as it shut. She finally let everything that had happened sink in. She took it all in at once. And she cried. She cried and wallowed just like her mom had told her to. She sat down on the couch and ate almost a whole carton of ice cream. She watched the same movie three times in a row. She even slept for a few hours. When her mom got home and found Rory laying in bed with her eyes open, just staring at the wall she just layed next to her and held her. Lorelai let her cry, then she ordered a pizza. They sat on the couch and watched Willy Wonka together. Willy Wonka always made Lorelai and Rory feel better. They didn't even have to talk, they just let the magic of Willy Wonka do all the talking.

"Rory, do you want to talk about this?" Lorelai asked when Willy Wonka ended.

"No, I don't feel like talking. I think I'm just going to bed." Rory tried to get up but Lorelai held her down. Lorelai looked her at Rory very seriously. She wouldn't lighten her grip off Rory's arm.

"Rory, you're going to have to talk. You can't move on if you won't talk about it. Rory I'm here for you, just talk to me sweetie." Rory broke free of her mother's grip.

"Just say it. You're happy. You're happy that he's not here. You never liked him. You never liked me liking him. You never even liked me being friends with him. Well now you can just go on with your happy life. He's gone." Rory screamed at Lorelai, tears streaming down her face. Rory ran out the door crying. She was still crying as she ran down the road. She ran all the way down to the lake. She sat there crying on the bridge. She thought about all the times she had sat on this bridge, and that just made her cry more. She thought about the one time Jess had bought her basket, and they sat on that very bridge and ate it together. She just sat there, crying, so hard and eventually she fell asleep. The next morning she woke up to her mother screaming in her face.

"Rory! Rory I've been looking for you everywhere! You didn't come home last night." Lorelai said, still shouting.

"I'm sorry, I got tired and well, here I am." Rory sat up and winced. She happened to have fallen asleep on her bad shoulder. "Ow." She whispered under her breath.

"Come on Rory, let's go home, you can sleep in a real bed." Lorelai said as she helped Rory stand up. She put her arm around Rory's shoulders as they walked home. Once they got back home Rory went to sleep in her own bed. Lorelai was really worried. She was worried that Rory would never be able to move on from this. She was worried about what was going to happen next. Most of all, she finally realized that Rory might have had more feelings for Jess than anyone ever realized.


	7. Run

**Author's Note: Okay, so I guess this is the last chapter. I'm really sorry, because I know that this last chapter is going to disappoint all of you. I thought back to my original plan for the story and I had an ending, which is basically this one. But I usually write for me, not for other people, so this is the ending that I pictured. So yeah. Also I even considered a Romeo and Juliet like ending, but I thought that if Rory ended up dying I'd get a lot more angry reviews. So yeah lol. This is my ending. Sorry for the rant. **

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A week or so after the accident Rory went back to school at Chilton. In a way she was happy. She didn't like missing school, she even made sure that her teachers e-mailed her every assignment so that she wouldn't fall behind. But in the same way she was sad. She was basically a zombie all week. She got up drank coffee did school work drank more coffee ate something and went to bed. Everyday. Lorelai gave up on trying to reach her. She knew that Rory would crack, and would have to talk eventually.

Rory felt good wearing her Chilton uniform for the first time in over a week. Lorelai smiled as Rory walked into the kitchen. "Coffee?" She asked, still smiling. It was good to see Rory up and around.

"Isn't that a given?" Rory laughed and Lorelai poured her a cup of coffee. Rory grabbed a Pop-Tart and kissed her mom on the cheek. She started to walk out the door when Lorelai caught her.

"Aren't you going to be a little early? Come on Rory, sit down. Drink your coffee. You have plenty of time to catch your bus." Lorelai really hoped that she would just sit down. Rory did. She took a drink of her coffee. "So, are you excited to go back to Chilton?"

"I don't know, I guess. Although a week without Paris was really nice." Rory said smiling. She looked at her mom. "Do you think I'm ready to go back to school?"

"Do you think that you're ready to go back to school?" Lorelai countered.

"I guess. I've been alright this week. It was nice to have a break." Rory said quietly, looking at her coffee. She didn't really ever want to leave the house. She would love to finish school at home, but when she brought that up to Lorelai, Lorelai rejected it in an instant.

"Rory, why don't you stay at home for a few more minutes, I'll drive you to school." Lorelai offered. Rory smiled.

"Sure, Mom, sounds good." Rory replied. By the time she and her mom got in the car they sat in awkward silence. Lorelai dropped her off at Chilton, Rory leaned in and kissed her mom on the cheek.

"Bye Rory!" She called as Rory left the Jeep.

"Bye Mom! Love you!" Rory called back. Rory walked into the school and down the hallway to her locker. She noticed that people were staring at her and she tried her best to ignore them. The bell rang and she was going to be late for class so she shut her locker. For a split second she thought she saw him standing there. She blinked and he was gone. She ran off to her first class. She made it to lunchtime. As she got her lunch tray she looked across the caf. She swore that she saw him standing there, giving her his little half smile of his. After lunch she decided that she couldn't take it. Rory Gilmore did something that she never imagined she would do. She grabbed her backpack and ran out the doors. She ran and got on a bus. She didn't know where she was going, or if she was ever coming back. She realized two things, one was that she was more like her mother than she thought she was. Two was that she had let one boy take over her life, and the thought scared and saddened her at the same time. She may be physically alive, but she felt that she was gone in that car crash. She was gone, and no one could stop her.


	8. Author's Note

Author's Note:

Hey guys! Someone reviewed my story and said that I should do a one-shot, that kinda wraps up the story, and I'm going to do just that. Just wanted to let you know, so put me on your author alert, because I'm going to put it under a different story, since it's just a one-shot follow up.

Thank you so much for reading and all your reviews, I really appreciate it.

Maddie


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